The style of my book must be in small pieces, as my life has been in pieces. (Jalal Barzanji)
From 1986 to 1988 poet and journalist Jalal Barzanji endured imprisonment and torture under Saddam Hussein's regime because of his literary and journalistic achievements-writing that openly explores themes of peace, democracy, and freedom. It was not until 1998, when he and his family took refuge in Canada, that he was able to consider speaking out fully on these topics. Still, due to economic necessity, Barzanji's dream of writing had to wait until he was named Edmonton's first Writer-in-Exile in 2007. This literary memoir is the project Barzanji worked on while Writer-in-Exile, and it is the first translation of his work from Kurdish into English. Foreword by John Ralston Saul.
Foreword xiii
Maps xvi
Preface xvii
Acknowledgements xix
Introduction xxi
1 The First Stage of Imprisonment 3
A Bitter Evening 3
A Deathly Quiet Cell 14
Hope Fading 24
A Hill of Blankets 31
Some Shocking News 40
Prison Number Five 46
Secret Funeral 49
2 Early Childhood in the Age of the Village 51
Unknown Birthday 51
A Fire in the Village 55
The Mystery Solved 63
Half of Ashkaftsaqa Dancing 65
Leaving Ashkaftsaqa 67
Our First Days in the City 73
Resuming School 76
An Unlikely Continuation of My Story 78
3 A City Boy 81
My Sun Rising Above the Citadel 81
An Overplayed Ball 86
Perhaps, Peace at Last 90
The Illusion Ends 93
A Teacher’s Life 100
4 A World of Words 105
The Lure of Reading 105
A Return to the Library 110
My First Publication 112
Writing in an Atmosphere of Fear 118
One Bright Moment 122
5 Life in Prison 127
My First Visitor 127
A Shared Home 135
Your Words Bring You Home to Me 138
A Poet Misses His Father 140
The Worst Deprivation 142
Nature’s Ways 144
Ghareeb’s Disappearance 145
The Third Visit 146
Health Issues 148
Cancelling the Visit 150
6 Fear in a Different Form 153
The Release 153
Fear Didn’t Leave Me Alone 160
An Anfal Story 162
Rapareen, or the Uprising 167
A Twist of Fate 171
Returning Home 177
7 Searching for a New Beginning 181
Crossing Borders 181
Ankara 1997 190
Seeking Asylum 197
Exile in Sivas 204
8 Another Attempt at Starting Over 213
Flying to a New Home 213
Losing My Luggage 216
Our Final Destination 220
A Death in Exile 226
Somewhere In-between 230
Justice at Last 238
Chronology 241
Glossary 245
Index 249